Sort of.

"As long as we don't talk about it, it's OK," he says.

As a mother who has witnessed the upheaval in a family when a member comes out as a homosexual, Grieco wants to help others in similar situations. She has recently started a local chapter of Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays.

According to the national PFLAG organization's Web site, it is a national support organization for gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transgenders and their families and friends. It has 200,000 members and supporters and 500 affiliates.

Support the goal

Grieco's goal is for the local chapter to provide families, friends and gays a safe opportunity to talk, air differences and support one another.

Even as children, Gabbard and Weidman knew they were gay but could not be open about it with their families until they were adults. Gabbard married and produced two children before finally being able to admit his homosexuality.
Having an organization such as PFLAG, whose members have been through similar conflicts, would have helped all concerned, he says.

"I wish I had known something about PFLAG back then," Gabbard says.

The Urban Institute, a Washington, D.C.-based nonpartisan economic and social policy research organization, estimates there are 3 million gay or lesbian couples living together in the U.S.

Because being gay or lesbian is still considered a stigma in many areas, it has been difficult to get an accurate count of homosexuals in this country. Studies have estimated they make up between 2 to 10 percent of the population, according to the institute.

These numbers are high enough that they should make parents aware having a gay child is at least a possibility, says the Rev. Suzie Chamness, pastor of the Spirit of Life Metropolitan Community Church in New Port Richey.

The 61-year-old Chamness is gay, as are the majority of her congregation's members.

Never knew

In her own case, her father died without knowing she was gay. "I don't think that was one of the words in his vocabulary."

PFLAG meetings give parents who have difficulty coping with their child's sexual orientation a chance to talk about their feelings, Chamness explains. "Parents can have the opportunity to say, 'I don't want my child to be gay.' "

The meetings can also offer support, she notes. "It's a chance for parents to find information, to share stories so that they can understand."

She says young people often find themselves caught between their own sexual feelings and society's attitude about homosexuality.

Those experiences can be harsh. Although the country is becoming more accepting of gay men, lesbians and transgender people, Chamness knows of young people who have been thrown out of their homes after coming out.
Weidman, Gabbard and Grieco hope the experiences they will share in PFLAG will help ease such situations.

"It will help other people," said Weidman. "It's all private and doesn't get told to anyone else."

The next meeting of PFLAG will be at 10 a.m. this Saturday, Jan. 19, at Spirit of Life Metropolitan Community Church, 4133 Thys Road, New Port Richey. Call 727-255-1121 for more information.

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